FEMINISM: EQUALITY WITH MEN

In this era of social media and all its accomplices, I have heard the word ‘’feminism’’ no fewer than a million and one times, and I was almost confused with the way the term is being used, so I had to look up the meaning of the word, read and also learn what the fuss is all about, and why now.

One of the definition is that; Feminism is a belief that MEN and WOMEN should have equal rights and opportunities. Another definition says ‘’it is an organized activity in support of women’s rights and interests’’.

Well, if you align yourself with the latter definition, I support you. I’m all for women rights and interest 100%. But I think the former definition should be classified…’’equal rights and opportunities’’? Where? This should be limited to workplaces; level playing ground for both sexes, ability to hold public office as the men, fair pay, maternity leave when due etc. Also; right to education, right to own property, right to vote etc. Feminist movement which also seek to protect women from rape, sexual harassment and domestic violence are also worthy movements.

But when they start mixing things all up and demanding ‘’equal rights in marriage’’, I wonder what they actually mean. And I also wonder if they actually mean what I am thinking…like EQUALITY IN MARRIAGE??? There’s no equality in marriage! Let’s not kid ourselves. There’s a husband, and there is a wife! The Holy Book calls the husband, the ‘’head’’, and he is the captain of the house. There is ONLY one head, and that is the husband, the man! And there can be no two heads in one body, take note. A lot of respect comes with the office of a head, and so does the responsibilities. Dear Women, you cannot have the best of both worlds. You cannot be a woman, and also say you want to hold unto the ‘’office’’ of the head (the man’s office), and chicken out when the responsibilities of the head comes in.

The man as a head, doesn’t make you the woman, a slave. It just means that while he is the Pilot, you are the co-pilot. Simple. No need trying to sell to us that there can be equality somewhere in between. You cannot have two masters. Even the Holy Book says that ‘’you cannot serve two masters’’. You people should not confuse us with this feminism in marriage thingy jare. I am not buying it…Thanks for trying.

It is since they started selling this idea to women that women started misconstruing the term and taking feminism to their homes, thereby causing conflict. No man, wants to be dethroned in his own home, no man wants to drag his God-given ‘’headship’’ with his wife, all in the name of feminism. It’s an ego thing. When the lady holds onto the man’s position, and the man struggles to get it back, conflict arises, and you can be sure that they are heading one way…DIVORCE.

This doesn’t go to say that a woman shouldn’t strive to be better, career-wise as men (in general) or compete for better positions in the office or for elective positions as the men, or own properties but if as a woman you are given the opportunity to do what interests you, and if you have a husband who supports you in all you do, you better shove your ‘’equality brouhaha’’ at the door of the house before you go in, and pick it up on your way out.

If a lady knows her place in the home, she’ll know she has no business being equal to her husband. She has a duty, and it is nowhere near being the head. At best, she is the neck, the lifter of the head.

It’s okay to describe yourself as a feminist. I see myself as one in a way. Let me explain…I cannot stand maltreatment of women anywhere especially when it is gender-motivated. I stand STRONGLY against rape, sexual harassment, domestic violence and workplace, education or voting stereotypes against women, but when we talk about the home front, marriage in particular, truth be told, I see NO equality. When you bring your ‘’feminism’’ into your marriage, then it isn’t about ‘’gender equality’’ anymore but about ‘’gender competition’’ and it is a lost cause, except you are okay with a push around for a husband.

We are Africans, and we have our standard. Let’s not get carried away with Westernization.

In times past, a husband was seen as a demi-god. Women and kids alike tremble at his feet. As much as I wouldn’t love for that to be the way of life now, dragging equality in the home with our men is not the way forward either.

If you have misconstrued the concept of ‘’feminism’’ and wrongfully brought it into your home, I advise that you make amends now and ‘’submit’’ to your husband.

I know some ladies would hate me for calling ‘’us’’ out. I couldn’t help it jare. I have to write the truth even if it is my oars that is gored. It is what it is.

What are your thoughts on this? Please share. I’ll love to read your opinions also.

Have a wonderful weekend. See you on the flipside of next week by God’s grace.

Mwah

Barby.