''OBODOYIBO'' DRAMA

My Sweethearts! How are you? How’s the week going? It seems like a long time I’ve spoken to you all, but I had to remind myself that I wrote an article last week and there was no feedback from you guys (when you people will not comment nko? Why wouldn’t it look like I’m here alone).

It’s been a roller coaster week for me and I’m enjoying it! I hope you all have reasons to smile this week and always.

For the benefit of those that don’t understand the meaning of ‘’OBODOYIBO’’; It means ‘’overseas, or a foreign country’’. Our dear brothers and sisters from this part of the world are often in the habit of travelling (through legal and illegal means) overseas in search of greener pastures. Sincerely, I have no problem with you taking a leap of faith or challenging yourself to a better life, but I have every problem with you not having a plan and just leaving your fate (and that of your dependents) in the hands of unknown persons or circumstances.

A story was told of a particular family; father, mother and four children. The fourth child, the only girl was just a few months old at the time. Father woke up one morning and informed his wife that a close friend of his who is a Nigerian but lives in a foreign country, promised him a brighter life in the foreign country, far better than he had in Nigeria. Father was impressed and convinced and set out to travel will this friend and promised to bring all the goodies back to his wife and kids in Nigeria when his fortune changes. He travelled by road and sea, to a distant country and along the line, his friend abandoned him, and he was left to fend for himself. To cut the unpleasant story short, Father was caught in the middle. He could not afford a roof over his head, or feed himself or find a decent job because he was an illegal immigrant. He lived in constant fear and no hope for the next day. He was constantly on the run dodging Immigration, and he couldn’t even afford his fare back to his country.

A year, two years, and three years passed. Now, his family here were also stuck. No means of livelihood, as his wife and kids had to eat into the profit and capital of her boutique and were asked to pack out from the shop when they couldn’t afford the shop rent. There was no means of communication between the Nigerian wife, and Obodoyibo husband because Obodoyibo husband could only call when he had the chance to, so if he didn’t call for twenty weeks, they didn’t get to talk for twenty weeks.

This is a real life story. I know the family personally. His wife in Nigeria was suffering, their children too were out of school as they were already in two years arrears of school fees and the school had to withdraw them. To be fair to his wife, I saw her work tirelessly to cater for the children all by herself, but there’s so little one person can do to take care of four children below ten years of age. No help was coming from family as they all seem to have deserted them. Friends tried, but it was never enough. And that was how this lady SUFFERED oooooooohhhh!!! (Yes, I had to emphasize that, because words aren’t just enough to describe what that lady passed through). She resorted to prayers and before long, her husband was deported safe and sound to Nigeria.

Shikena.

Whenever family men/women wake up and start this ‘’obodoyibo’’ greener pasture thingy, I am always very weary and pessimistic initially. Blame it on the many stories we hear every day. People wake up and just travel abroad without no plans, leaving their family and dependents here in Nigeria to suffer and become the mockery of the society. They act like there’s one magic abroad that makes people rich once you travel. Abi is there? Make me sef plan my trip?

So many ugly stories. I have heard a lot of them. Different storylines, same craze.  A man marries a lady, abandons her in his parent house here in Nigeria and travels to Obodoyibo. One year, two, three, four years…husband has not come back nor has he come to visit his wife in Nigeria. She stays in the husband’s family house, does the normal ‘’iyawo’’ (wife) duties and is considered a wife to an absentee husband. Nawa! Women dey see sha! If na me, I’ll drop the ring and waka my own. There’s something called DESERTION. Aint nobody got time for siddon look.

Personally, I’ll prefer that my husband and I stay in the same place and build our family together. If there’s a reason to travel, it has to be for a short term or if it’s a long term, then, we should be together. And all travelling overseas should be done legally (no desert hideouts or tree jumping, or diving kind of drama). I love a close knitted family. I believe, we can both encourage ourselves better if we see each other at the end of each day, and discuss our fears, concerns and successes. There’s a limit we can achieve if you’re in Obodoyibo, and I am in Lagos. Besides, when a partner is far away, the temptation to do ‘’unholy’’ things would be there and unchecked. Call me naïve or over protective or WA-EVA, I don’t curr! LMAO. Then again, who says you cannot make it in my beloved country NIGERIA? Who says there are no opportunities for a person to succeed? Those that succeed with home based businesses and companies, do they have two heads? Abeg oh, I cannot now come and go and kill myself for sufferhead. I heard some people even wash dead bodies and sleep by the roadside or pack sh*t all in the name of obodoyibo waka. Issorai.

Dear Diarians, what’s your opinion on this? What stories have you heard about the obodoyibo sojourners? Would you travel and abandon your family for years all in the name of greener pastures? Would you allow your partner travel for uncertain job opportunities or favors? Please share your thoughts. We’ll love to hear from you…

Have a fulfilling week, and yeah, Happy Sallah Celebrations to all our Muslim readers. I want my ram meat pwizzzzzz.

Barby.